I saw this on Facebook and it brought me flying back to my blog as it totally triggered me. I needed my safe space :-p
She never used “we just had sex last weekend” which leads me to believe that they didn’t else that would be the first line on Monday. I went through years of this. Years. Look back in the archives. Begging and pleading and trying to connect and then the few times an advance was tolerated, it was more or less like this glory-hole thing where she makes it as clinical and unpleasant as possible.
SO….2009 I stepped off that treadmill and stopped initiating. In one of our last ever counseling sessions, the coundselor did this little assessment, asking us each to to give a score for areas of concern on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the most distressed and 1 being the least. Money….health….kids….sex…..several things I can’t remember. My scores were generally on the lower end as I was not too distressed about many things and even my frustration over lack of sex was maybe a 6 or 7. I was getting ver it. But Arwyn’s scores were all 8 or higher! I was kinda surprised she had rated herself an 8 on sexual distress. We never really pursued that line with this second counselor and I didn’t bother to follow-up. After all, it had already been 3-4 years of being sexless. While I do miss sex, I miss the good kind, not the crappy, begrudging “Here, get it over with” kind. I found other interests, other hobbies. Sex is a great thing but it’s not the only thing. And honestly, most of the time it isn’t worth the trouble we go through to get it.
I watched a few other of her videos and have a feeling that her little community might find itself over run with the Red-Pill, MGTOW crowd because she is sort of the arhctype stay-at-home mom, which is why so many other women love her. And honestly, her video above nailed it perfectly and judging by the comments from other ladies it’s more the rule than the exception. One fellow did run a translation in the comments that basically shows how a guy feels after getting rejected repeatedly. Kudos to him, but he’s still in the early stages of this. Basically in the early stages, us guys are pretty pussy addicted. We’ll do anything to get it. We’ll run ourselves into the ground for it. We’ll beg, plead, try to reason and persuade. We’ll bargain, even settling for terribly lopsided deals to get it. That’s actually what marriage has become– the lopsided deal where the women hold all the cards and the men have none.
The idea is that marriage is where sex gains legitimacy between a husband and his wife. That’s where it is supposed to be the most frequent and at its best. Didn’t turn out that way for me though. It became a source of frustration and conflict until it got to the point where there was so little pleasure compared to the cost where it wasn’t worth risking rejection. Certainly not worth a fight. And generally I’m happier and better off without constantly wondering if I did the right thing, did enough things, did pleasing enough things or if the odds were in my favor.