One Way to Get Things to Change

After years and years of drifting aimlessly and without any movement whatsoever, it now appears that there is something.

After losing my SL GF, I set up an avi with my blog name, hoping that perhaps someone from over here might crossover there.  But alas, for whatever reason, that ship has sailed.  The blog world isn’t what it used to be and neither is Secondlife.  Blogging was at its peak arounnd 2008 and SL at about the same time.   Facebook might be partially to blame as it has been taking over just about everything non-Google.

Anyway, I did eventually meet someone else while in this new avi and it seemed like the most awesome relationship ever.  I invited me into my little RP world and she became an elf and she quickly became MY elf.  Life was wonderful.  Except for a couple of things.  First I had an actual job requiring me to not be inworld.  And I also still have vestiges of a lofe outside of the internet with my kids.

All of this came into a glaring and frightful head about a month ago.  I was online with my elf girl and it was about midnight.  We were chatting and were actually having a bit of an argument about me continuing to be friends with my old fae GF. It was not the best chat in the word because I might have had a little wine, too.  I took a time out and stepped out on the patio for a smoke.  I hastily put the cig out in a peat pot and went back in and resumed the heated online conversation.  Of all the STUPID things.

About an hour later, I heard a ruckus in the kitchen as Arwen had gotten up.  She was sleeping in the other room and woke up.  I heard her cry out “FIRE” and I knew.

What happened next was a frantic blur.  I closed my laptop and quickly walked to the window of the patio to see it brightly lit where it should have been dark.  I open the garage door and Arwen presumably went to work getting the kids out.  I went to get the garden hose.

My thought was that I might be able to yet get this thing since it was confined to the patio.  Problem: My hoses we all on the covered patio.  I reached for the first one I saw and it melted in my hand while the inferno was blazing around me.  I did manage to get ahold of a decent spool of hose and drug it around to the side of the house where there was a spigot.  I looked up as the flames climber toward the peak of the roof on the outside toward the electrical wires.  I realized was not going to win this fight.  At all.  I left the hose and ran to the front of the house where Arwyn was crying because she could not find one of our cats.  My youngest was crying about us now bwing homeless.  And my oldest…..I did not see.

I went back into the house and found him sort of wondering in his room as the house was filling with smoke and got him out and then proceeded to grab my two laptops, phone and wallet.  By this time the fire department was there and and after fidding with the hydrant in our lawn that did not work managed to get a hose from another down the street.  I got our cars out of the garage (Getting Arwyn’s involved grabbing keys from the burning kitchen behind a fireman) and was finally able to make use of the garden hose to wash and cool the burns I received during my aborted fire fighting attempt.

I did end up being ambulanced to the local burn clinic where I spent the night.  And I was relieved when I learned that the second cat had been located and rescued.  So everyone made it out okay.  I got 2nd degree burns on my face, hands and arms but was otherwise okay.

So, needless to say, things have been a bit traumatic this past month.  The house is pretty much a total loss.  We salvaged some things, but most of it is smoke and water damaged.  The fire had gotten in the attic and went all the way through.  One silver lining was that we happen to have a super insurance plan so have been fairly well taken care of on that score.  We also have two churches that have really stepped in and helped out in lots of ways.  We have a wonderful place to live at the moment while our house is being rebuilt.  The rebuilt house is going to be far nicer and better than the house we originally bought.

And this has changed our relationship, Arwyn and I.  I’ll get to that in a separate post since this mainly provides important background information.  But one could argue that a fire was literally lit under us.  Is it good or bad?

I suppose it depends on how you look at it.

As far as my SL elf, I was all over in love with her, but when the going got tough, she got going.  A week after the fire, with my hands bandaged and barely able to type, we called it quits.  She basically got tired of me not being there for her.  Nevermind my house burned down and I was burnt!  So getting out from under that was a blessing though she played her own role in helping me to see that Arwyn and I were in a deep stalemate that was bound to break as soon as one of us met someone else.

One of the hardest things about this fire was the fact that I started it from my own carelessness.  And EVERYONE, without exception ALWAYS asks “How did the fire start?”  My stock answer is “Stupidity” and try to leave it at that.  Qutting smoking is a bear and even though I did it before, I knew it was going to be bitch to go through that again.  I discovered e-cigarettes and that has worked really well for me so far.  I’m not a super heavy smoker, but there is a huge relief in having no smoke and no ash and no butts and no smell to worry about.  I have not told Arwyn yet, but will do that before my next post just so I got something fresh to update.

We are back in couples counselling with a different counsellor.  And true enough, I think maybe things would have been different if we had her in our earlier attempt.  But then again, maybe no.

 

 

 

 

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6 Responses to One Way to Get Things to Change

  1. Anais says:

    Holy.

    Shit.

    !!!!!!

  2. Holy shit, Digger! I’m glad you guys all made it out safely, and that is awful that you were burned. I just can’t even imagine – a total loss. Wow. Well, I’m thinking of you guys and can’t wait to read more updates – miss hearing from you!

  3. Ginny says:

    Wow!!!! Glad that you and all of your family (pets too) got out safe – and yes, this is one (not recommended) way to change your life…………looking forward to hearing what effect all of this has had on your relationship with your wife (& yourself).

  4. Dave says:

    Good Lord, I’m glad you’re all safe! Burns aside, that’s a bad bad thing- so thank God! I hope that the good/bad will be good- but let us know, either way, holy cats.

  5. Xavier says:

    Wow, sorry you are going through that. Fires are life-changing, we lost my childhood home after a couple of them. Hang in there.

    Eagerly awaiting the rest of the story … time to check it out/.

  6. Val says:

    WOW! Look at all I’ve missed… I echo everyone else – everything is replaceable except lives & health.

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