I’ve been thinking about FTN’s blogger Meet-Up this weekend, and wondering what I’m going to do about my own blogging situation. There’s a part of me that would really, really like to be there hobnobbing with the folks who I have been virtually hobnobbing with for the last several years. In fact, y’all are not a problem at all for me.
It’s not you, it’s me.
Or rather it has been about a lot of the content that I have subjected my readers to over the past few years. As I noted in a comment below, I was more of a sex blogger when I wasn’t actually having sex…with someone else. I guess that’s because I had more time, energy and frustration to channel into this hobby! I was also channeling more kinky energy into it, and the kinksters loved me for it. They love everyone who is willing to channel that sort of energy, and the chastity community was particularly generous. They have more frustrated energy to channel than most, though. That is probably the one storyline that might keep this blog alive. If I ever get into that again (with Arwyn’s full participation) then I would definitely need a place to write about those experiences and an anonymous blog is the perfect place for that. At least for me…Tom Allen has really managed to make it work for him right out there in the open with assorted (or sordid) pictures. He’s got more courage and skill than me. Maybe when I get to be his age…
There are a couple of issues tugging at me. One is one Xavier recently had to deal with. That is balancing his level of exposure with his need to be anonymous. He was really “getting out there” with pictures, blogs and even some videos while sharing some of his inner world with us. When he was outed, he ended up having to sanitize his content in order to avoid pissing off his wife. It’s just lucky he didn’t go dark altogether. In my case, there is a desire to extend out more. I do have another blogiverse that is open, legit and out there and it is also infinitely more popular than this little corner of the universe. Trouble is, it is respected and respectable and read by really important people. If you type certain words into Google, that blog is the first thing that pops up. Arwyn hears from some of her friends who like reading it. She feels ambivalent about that level of exposure, even as minimal as it is. She would totally melt down if this blog got out to THAT population! And so would I.
So this blog (and all of my blogs linked to it) have become liabilities to that other universe. I would have no problems whatsoever with any of you going over there. I might even have slipped that way a time or two and have even invited a couple people over there when I thought they needed that information. But those folks could not survive the glare, shock and awe of coming over here! Then, yeah, the whole place goes dark pretty much instantly.
My Unsolicited Advice Blogger Site might be able to survive that sort of purge just because it was designed to stay pretty sanitized as far as personal content for just that reason. If I needed to get rid of personal posts, that would be the last anonymous fall-back position since it isn’t very widely read anyway. But it might be worth reading and looking at what I wrote way back in July. I saw this crapfest we’re in coming from a distance.
Arwyn. She is TOTALLY not down with this sort of thing. At all. Her exposure here, by virtue of the prevailing theme and storyline, is very extensive. If she ever got into this archive, it would probably slide us back into the stone age, marital progress-wise. The further we get, progress-wise, the less I am willing to risk it all. This blog ends up being a liability on that front. It’s just a mine waiting to go off. There’s no way I could possibly sanitize it, short of nuking the whole archive, which might be the way it goes.
So here’s the deal. While I do have some video content, it’s always from the waist down. The day I decide to give up the schizophrenic/multiple personalities/many faces dilemma, you all get get to see me full-on. No, not THAT, ya pervs! Besides, you’ve already seen it if you’ve been reading me long enough! But I’m already working on something that would be a finale of sorts. It wouldn’t be me closing a door as much as opening up a brand new one. At least that’s the theory.
Which brings me back to the original thought of FTN’s little convention. You folks will have a bit of an advantage of a sort in you know each other on a different level. Yeah, it will be interesting to see how he negotiates the oral sex topic or if he ends up going dark after everyone pesters Autumn about why she isn’t giving that up for him before he goes and finds himself an intern or something. Or the comments to Desmond about his Monkey Business. Good times!
I’m having issues with the anonymous blog life and the RL digital life and bridging the whole business of the public (and personal) trust. Sex blogging and my real life occupation do not intermix so very well. In fact, they don’t mix at all. But I haven’t been that good of a sex blogger for quite some time. My traffic is way down. My single most popular post was written in 2005 when I wrote about sticking something up my butt. It out did my next most popular post by a 4:1 margin. I peaked out when AAG was my keyholder and her thousands of fans mobbed my little site. Before the move to WordPress, I could draw in 350 hits a day. Now, I hover around 50, unless I really churn out content and then I can score about 100. And that really is fine, because I’m not looking for a high profile here. I like the few regular readers and friends that I have. It’s a more intimate and friendly crowd, even when we bicker about stuff.
Anyway, I am seriously jonesing for some news about the Indie meet. I just know there was some naked hot tub action!
Hopefully someone brought a video camera.