Counseling, a Meme and 195.4

I’ll just weigh in a day or two early and then go get something to eat!LOL!

2amsomewhere recently did a purpose driven meme and tagged me with it. Actually, I was already on my way over off the link before I saw I’d been tagged. It’s a survey put on by some of his friends at the Schnarch Center about relationships and sex. The purpose of this is to normalize their results and to test it, so there aren’t any results to be gotten, unlike the little quizzes in my “About” page. However it does make a body think about what they think.

In order to make sure that these two instruments are reliable and valid with a large and diverse population, we would greatly appreciate it if you would cut and paste the link on to your website or forward it to your friends. We want a diverse population in terms of ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, age and gender!

So these are 2am’s rules:

  1. Take the survey described above.
  2. Create a blog posting announcing the survey.
  3. Tag seven other bloggers to take the survey by listing them in your post and contacting them by either e-mail or blog comment.

Only one more thing to do, which is #3. Seven seems like a high number to me, but let me see if I can find the 7:

  1. Christian Husband
  2. FTN
  3. Confused Husband
  4. Xi Summit
  5. Tajalude
  6. Hazel
  7. Mu Ling

Hey, that wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be! I’m sort of worried about the results being all skewed and dysfunctional due to the nature of my blogroll, though.

And finally, just wanted to share something I found on Rod Smith’s blog that was enlightening. When Will Counseling work Best? When will it not?… is a pretty fair and balanced treatment of the subject. Lot’s of you have weighed in, and considering the results of my last post I thought a fair treatment of the subject was in order. I think the biggest obstacle at the present time is …well… time. If I was really sick and injured, I would go to see a doctor. But I’d have to really be sick or injured. I’ve got sore ankles and knees and sometimes get the sniffles, but I’m not seeing anyone.

So that must mean that things in my relationship aren’t bad enough. Yet.

Yeah, that pretty much sums things up. I mean if they were all that bad I would more seriously be weighing the therapist/attorney options. But Arwyn has become a better roommate than she was a year ago. There is that much progress, which is better than none at all. The house isn’t all run down when I come home and it is manageable enough that I can help out when needed. It’s easier to cook in a clean kitchen. We are talking better about money. Every month, we are going over her credit card balances and we each write out checks. We probably need to expand that conversation a bit more about other expenses but there is movement. The sex thing is just a big, huge boil that irritates everything else. I’m not confronting her at all because while I’m attracted to her physically I’m not up for the “mercy fuck.” I was hoping my weight loss would help lessen the “mercy” part of it for her, so she might actually want to do it more. Or maybe I haven’t lost enough, yet.


I’m in the process of properly tagging everyone by commenting on their blogs, so if I haven’t gotten to you yet, consider yourself warned!

[Now I know why I don’t do more comments and tags…blogspot word verification SUCKS!  I ALWAYS end up having to type goofy crap out several times!] 

8 Responses to Counseling, a Meme and 195.4

  1. xi summit says:

    Thanks for the tag. Forgive me if it takes a bit, but I will get to it. Too much going on right now …..

  2. Square1 says:

    I’ve filled my meme quota for the month. So there!

  3. Square1 says:

    P.S. You’re featured for my Word Picture Sunday post.

  4. Emily says:

    I know you are bored with the whole counselling theme, so I hesitate to say this, but…

    Please don’t consider counselling to be somehow on a par with resort to an attorney. Counselling works a whole lot better before the relationship deteriorates that far. In fact, most counsellors would tell you that many couples leave counselling far too late to do any good!

    If you actually have some equilibrium with Arwyn at the moment, and not so much active conflict, this could be a perfect time to try the counselling

  5. FTN says:

    Ditto to what Emily said. If you are equating counseling with an attorney in any way, then the counseling would never do you any good. I think you are looking at it the wrong way. I know quite a few Christian married couples in counseling that are open about it… And they, from what I can tell, are nowhere near a divorce.

    I did the survey. Always a struggle to answer questions about specific sexual dissatisfaction, and then still try to tell the survey that overall, I’m satisfied with my marriage… Are you trying to depress me here?

  6. aphron says:

    I’m not sure I can add anything. Obviously, I’m no expert on relationship issues, since I can’t solve my own. All I can say is that I feel afraid to open that can of worms. I might not like the results.

  7. xi summit says:

    Well, I done went and did the survey part of this exam. I’ll be thinking next about the tag part.

  8. Katie says:

    I did the survey even though I wasn’t tagged. :b

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