Younger Girls

Xi Summit has been chronicling his history with Queenie and it has actually been an interesting read.  Not just for content but for the style of his writing, which always contains a fair amount of restraint.  I imagine him blushing with embarrassment when writing about accidentally touching his then-girlfriend’s breast.  But this girl became his one and only and he’s been playing it straight and narrow all the way since.  He’s a better man than me.

 

One prime source of embarrassment for him was Queenie being 4 years younger, which was sort of a big deal when she was 13. I do get that.  But like I said, he’s a better man than me.

 

My first steady girlfriend might have followed a similar trajectory if things stayed on course.  Suzie was 15 when we first went out.  I was twenty *cough* one!  And we dated off and on for the next 4 years.   We did kiss and make out.  I did touch a bare breast of hers…once.  We could have done more but it was a mismatch.  So this was the biggest age difference for me, right?

 

Right?

 

Um.  No.

 

I was 26 when I met Ellen.  By this time I had quite a bit more experience with some women my own age.  I went back to college for a year after working a year or two, and that is where I met Ellen through some roommates.  What I did NOT know, was that she was only 16.  How in the hell does a girl get into college at 16?  I don’t know, but I did show her some of the famous artwork prints on my bedroom wall which led to some awkward fucking.  She was cool with it, but I did feel guilty about that later on.  And that was a one time deal. 

 

So there you have it.  My run-in with the younger girls that could have landed me in jail.

 

Right?

 

Um.  Well.  There’s one more.

 

Fast forward several months.  I’m a camp counselor for little kids as a summer job.  And there is this CIT (Counselor In Training) who could not have been more than 17.  Melanie was what you might a call a free spirit.  One night she took ME somewhere to show me some professional B&W photos she had done of herself.  Nekkid photos.  The guy who took them could have been arrested for child porn.  But they were…um…tasteful other than the fact she was at least a bit under age.  I was a bit more reluctant with her, but she’s the one who slipped into my bed late at night.     We didn’t get to any full-blown intercourse, but there was semi-naked making out aplenty over a few weeks, including one memorable session in a covered wagon.  That still ranks as the most exotic locale, even though we stopped short of going all the way.  JUST short.  But naked making out is still pretty good.  And still would land me in jail today. 

 

I’m not exactly proud of any of this, but at the same time this was almost 20 years ago and I have been through too much to have a lot of regrets.  I really liked all those girls and they all really liked me at least at that point in time.  In all cases we parted as friends, with no regrets as far as I know.  Thanks for the memories.

 

I do think it is worth mentioning (again) that I waited to have sex until I was 25.  Did I wait too long or not long enough?  I don’t know, but I was immature and a late bloomer in that regard.  Melanie was ages beyond me in sexual experience or so it seemed.  Suzie and I were equally clueless, and Ellen was sort of looking to gain experience.  I was in a very rebellious phase when I met Ellen and Melanie, and went through a sizable string of women during a 3 year stretch.  I’m okay with having those experiences, especially considering the desolate place I’m in now.  I at least have those fond memories to look back on.

 

I would eventually begin dating older women, which is where I would get my real sexual education.  The younger girls did have a sweetness about them that I remember fondly, but the encounters were always a bit awkward.  But they loved kissing and being touched.

 

One thing Xi noted and I’ll concur with, is that the younger girls never really did give a lot of thought touching me.  They let me use their bodies as amusement parks and I was all too happy to do it.  But now it occurs that they were always looking for me to be the aggressor and they were relatively passive.  Even Melanie who was a little seductress, basically showed up with few or no clothes on and let me do whatever without a lot of reciprocity.  

 

The idea of a woman taking some initiative and exploring her man’s body seems to be a relatively recent concept or one that age and experience teaches.  Figuring out what gets a guy off, or what makes him tick physically is the domain of today’s Cosmo girls.  I don’t think most older married women even give it a thought.  Perhaps they think they don’t need to explore.  Or they are not as inquisitive and curious as most guys.  Or they do not care how to make sex better for their man.  In fact, there is a cluster of us guys who seem to be married to women who seem more vested in making it worse!

 

 

D.

 

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9 Responses to Younger Girls

  1. Mu Ling says:

    Oh, Digger. First, why is “knowing how to please a guy” the main criteria here of sexual maturity? What strikes me is that these girls didn’t know anything about how to please themselves. What if they had not thought of sex as something that was done “to” them? What if they had thought of it as something that they could take and enjoy and claim for themselves? Pleasing a partner matters, yes, but if you’re alienated from your own pleasure, pleasing your partner merely becomes service.

    And what’s up with the panting evocation of the Cosmo Girl who spends lotsa time thinking about how to get guys off, while the old married broads sit around selfishly in their curlers and bathrobes selfishly ignoring men? When you write like this I feel as if you totally ignore all the women on your blogroll who write frankly and passionately about their sexual desires.

  2. diggerjones says:

    First off u Ling, thanks for stopping by! Secondly, *knowing* how to please a guy is a relatively minor (and simple) skill. I hardly fault anyone that young for not knowing. However, being interest in learning, now that’s something worth thinking about. I’m just thinking about curiosity and exploration, and you’re right. That would include being curious about your own pleasure.

    The women on my blogroll who write passionately about their desires haven’t been writing quite as much, lately, compared to the guys who are married to said selfish old broads. Even if you’re not actually having sex, thinking about it and writing about it is a form of “putting out.” And the guys have been putting out more.

    Except for Always Aroused Girl, who always puts out. Except she’s now writing about the sex she’s actually having which puts her in a different class than those of us sex bloggers who write about it without actually having it.

    I look forward to reading your thoughts.

    D.

  3. Dave says:

    Interesting post. I’d not particularly noticed, perhaps because of my very limited experience with different partners (IE, I married my only sexual partner); but, I can attest that as we’ve gotten older, she’s become much more comfortable exploring my body, and her own as well.

  4. Mu Ling says:

    Hi Digger, thanks for the response. I think we’re pretty much on the same wavelength as far as your first paragraph goes.

    I can only speak for myself about why I haven’t been blogging as much lately. Unfortunately I haven’t got that much to say, either on my blog or in this comment. I suppose I am tired of writing about all my unfulfilled desires. I can’t be funny or creative about it the way you are. I don’t have interesting sociological observations, or religious faith. I mostly feel numb.

    Hm, I guess I’d rather read Cosmo too. Or Always Aroused Girl. Or whatever.

    Anyway, you keep blogging now, you hear? Because reading you is one of the things that make me feel a little less alone.

  5. Emily says:

    Well, I must plead guilty about writing in my blog less. It’s getting harder to have the time now that my Little Dude is dropping day time sleep.

    Although its also partly because I am actually having more sex in real life 🙂

  6. xi summit says:

    Interesting theory, and I think there’s a bit of truth to it even if it can not be ‘generally’ applied. There are, frankly, plenty of women who would be more than able to prove it wrong but then there are perhaps a fair share more who think that’s how it should be.

    The old consumer market place, where prices are negotiated. He who wants it most works hardest for it or pays the most for it. Or both. Such was my case for many years.

  7. xi summit says:

    Oh, and accidently touching the breast? Blush? Heck no, though there was a bit of insanity:

    “If I don’t move it away will she hit me? How long should I wait before that first squeeze? Man, this is delightful! Hope she doesn’t tell anyone. Hey, five seconds and counting! I’m just saying …. wait, why are you talking to yourself? Shut up and pay attention before it’s gone! For the summer! The whole summer, two months and change. Man, that’s not right! Maybe she could quit and get something local. Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about. Ahhh, but her parents would never go for that. Crap, not only am I thinking, now I’m answering myself. Sheesh, can’t you concentrate? WOOHOO! Ten seconds! And no sign of trouble. Would she notice if I opened my eyes, you know to see if my hand’s really where I claim it is? It’s not like I knew what it felt like before. Not that I’m inexperiencd or anything, you know how it is. Man, would you just shut up already?
    Fifteen seconds …. “

  8. trueself says:

    Speaking for myself, the reason I didn’t actively “roam” but just allowed my body to be used as his own personal amusement park was that I didn’t know what to do. Not…A…Clue. I was so afraid to do the wrong thing that I did nothing at all. Never had a boyfriend that seemed to mind so all was well, or so I thought. Now I find out they were wanting more all that time. Sheesh! I can’t win. . .

  9. thecougar says:

    Good post. I give you a lot of credit for putting it all out there. Even if it was over 20 years ago.

    It saddens me to think that so many guys complain about sex and the lack thereof or the lacking quality. Young guys don’t like the awkwardness of young girls and older men complain their wives don’t give them enough. IDK I think I will forever remain in the lifestyle I am in. Dating younger, eager men who are seeking the experience and aggressiveness.

    The Cougar

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