Snakes Don’t Wear Vests



Where do I start?  Where oh where to start?


I’ve spent the last 90 minutes slinking throughout Oblivion’s blog.  Her history is short but she’s got big archives.  I have no idea why I haven’t seen her before.  I’m sure I have but it just never registered.  As a collector of train wreck marriages, my trophy case wouldn’t be complete without her addition to my collection.  And since KJ disappeared, I currently have an opening for this exact kind of story.


Anyway, she has this new tattoo in the small of her back that her husband has not seen yet.  Well, it’s not a new tattoo, exactly.  It’s 3 months old.  If you go back into her archives YOU can see it.  So yeah, you all get to see something her husband has not seen before he gets to see it.  How cool is that?


In 2006, I wore the cage on a few occasions, and each time shaved the nest off from around the bird of paradise.  And each time it grew back completely.  And Arwyn never knew, noticed or cared.  Of course if she got a tattoo would I notice?  If the opportunity exists, I’m looking.  I adore seeing her naked.  But she does not adore me seeing her naked so much.  Must be my reptilian eyes or something.


Like the time I tried to snuggle and she commented my arm was too heavy.  I told her that maybe they were too rough like a reptile’s. 


“Reptile?  What are you talking about?”


“Well, you hate my touch so much, I figured I must be all rough, creepy and scaly like a snake.” I offered.


“Snake skin is smooth.” She said as she rolled over and went to sleep. 


How utterly comforting.


But that was then, a few months ago.


Now, let’s go back to another time a few months ago, when we described my sleeping arrangements.  Yes, following FTN’s little theme.  Remember the stunning pictures.  (odd…WP didn’t even archive that post)


Arwyn asked tonight if I could sleep in my oldest’s room whilst he slept in our bed.  It was just the way she did it.  Of course, she was in the bed and so was he, so there was no making a scene, here.  There was me going to the computer to spend time with you all.  And there’s that bottle of wine that I bought b fore the holidays that hasn’t been opened yet…


Screw-off cap!  Cool!  No need for a corkscrew!


I’m curious how the “sleep-in-separate-beds/rooms” folks do it.



7 Responses to Snakes Don’t Wear Vests

  1. Satan says:

    With style, flair and as often as possible. Thanks for asking. 😛

  2. So Gone says:

    No seriously, what will it take for you to step up and take some control of this marriage? I mean, do you even care anymore? Do you care if the marriage fails at this point? Because the avoiding thing is doing a pretty damn good job of leading you guys in that direction.

    I’m sorry, this just sucks.

  3. Cat says:

    Ah Oblivion the first blog I actually commented on instead of just lurking 🙂 I read the apathy too but unlike So Gone I am not so sure of what you can do take “control” of the situation. Do you grab Arwyn and put her in a rope tie so you can spoon each other at night? Now of course I wouldn’t be opposed to such activity but I am not sure your wife would agree.

    All joking aside I am sorry to hear your wife continues to pull away from you. Without intimacy what is the point of marriage?

  4. Trueself says:

    Well, the way W and I do it is he sleeps in his room, and I sleep in mine. He doesn’t ask to come into my bed, and I don’t invite him. We no longer kiss or touch each other. Occasionally we accidentally brush by one another in the hallway.

    It is an ideal situation. NOT!

  5. Val says:

    I am right at the stage of requesting separate bedrooms — not from sexual incompatibility, bcz DH SNORES like a freakin’ BUZZ SAW, even earplugs ain’t helping!!! A full night of unbroken sleep sounds like SUCH a luxury to me at this point…
    (Sleep deprivation is making me psychotic)

  6. Therese says:

    I hope that was a one time incident and sleeping in separate beds doesn’t become the norm. As if you need one more way for your wife to distance herself from you…

    Arwyn started sleeping with her head near the door to hear your son in the night, right? Is there some reason that you didn’t move to that position as well?

    Val, you get used to the sleep deprivation eventually. Then you end up being only slightly psychotic as time wears on. 🙂

  7. diggerjones says:

    Well, my chainsaw-like sleeping does not help matters. That does play into things prominently and reading other folks who go to seperate rooms…well I get that. At this stage, if we had another room, I think I might go for it.


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