I had a flash of an idea and needed to get to it before it became losy.
Christian Husband is making an issue out of his wife not being able to orgasm from intercourse. The literature on this indicates that this is true for many women, if not the vast majority. I don’t think he has problems with that as much as he has problems with the fact that his wife is so rigid in not even trying. That part, I understand totally.
Rigidity is a hard thing to deal with, because it seems a rigid person is so brittle and prone to breaking. A person can be tough without breaking, like the head of a hammer. But if they are rigid, they are actually less tough.
I just thought I would shed additional light on rigidity from another point of view. Arwyn has a difficult time reaching her orgasm. In fact, I could not tell you the last time she had one or even if she has ever definitely had one. I have been with other women who had them and left little doubt as to what was going on. Arwyn has not been so definitive in her physical responses.
Arwyn is dead set against oral sex. Totally. I went down on her on our wedding night and that was the last taste I ever got. Arwyn has not ever let me use my fingers on her. I barely get to touch her breasts. So she has arranged things such that the only possible way she an ever reach orgasm is through sexual intercourse. So this is where her efforts (historically) have been rigidly fixed.
Like so many of the sex-starved guys, my capacity to last is directly proportional the frequency of sex. More frequency = me lasting longer. Historically speaking, of course since we have not had a frequency surpassing 1x a month for the past couple of years. So I have heard complaints about how I don’t stay hard long enough.
Fucking a relative stranger would be a lot easier in many ways. Emotional connection can enhance love making. But emotional conflict just makes it a bother. We have a history of sexual conflict, pain and hurt. We are building a history of distance, or so it seems. Even a relatively HL person like me feels totally confined within a sexual straight jacket to the point of being turned OFF.
Being dogmatic and rigid are sure ways to kill sexual interest for almost anyone given enough time. I never thought I’d choose a “no sex” option over bad sex, but I guess I have.