Happy New Year!
It's amazing how one marathon sexual encounter can include so much drama and intrigue. Simply amazing. Let's go back…
The New Year's Eve adventure began shortly after the kids were in bed. Arrwyn came and asked me if I wanted to take a quick shower. This is as sure of a signal as I can get from her that there is sex ahead. I was actually mulling over my options. I thought about running to the store for some beer to conclude 2005 when Arwyn's invitation came. I decided it could still be an option if we finished soon enough. Right.
We had a little discussion when Arwyn asked me if I was locked up, which I was. She asked if I wanted to be unlocked and I told her she could if she wanted, but it wasn't strictly necessary. She then proceeded to look for the keys and couldn't find them. I had thought I'd extended the Timelock, so I wasn't sure I could get out that way, but told Arwyn I would check. Lo and Behold, the combination was decrypted. So I unlocked and replaced the key. Meanwhile, Arwyn found her keys. In the subsequent discussion, she said she didn't want to be responsible for them and really didn't want to fool with the cage anymore. She said I could if I wanted, but she didn't want to do it. I tried to explain how the cage helped move me into a better headspace to love her more the way she wanted me to. While she appreciated the effort, she was not really changing her mind. So the first emotion of the evening was disappointment.
So, I proceed to get a towel, undo the cage and take my shower. When I emerged, Arwyn was in bed, still wearing her sweat shirt. When I got into bed, I discovered she was naked from the waist down. She proceeded turn out all the lights and shed the shirt. She then climbed on top of me and began grinding into me with some intermittent kissing. I was hard and ready to go until she sat up and said "I should have asked for some natural progesterone for Christmas." Fact is, she simply was not very wet, and my own confidence deflated. She kept sticking with it, and whenever I got hard she would try to get me inside of her. At one point she said I could give her a backrub whilst she was on top. My hands were everywhere, anyway and despite some frustrations, I was enjoying our naked bodies together. I kneaded her back a bit and she flinched and winced when I touched her lower back as it was really sore.
We then switched to me on top, but she was still not wet enough. Then her on top again, with her kneading my cock with her hands when I got too soft. I inched my hands around her hands towards her pussy, wanting to help her out a bit, but she wanted none of that.
Finallly, she rolled off. "Are you too tired?" she asked.
"No." And I wasn't. I was frustrated and told her so.
"What are you frustrated for?" she asked.
So I told her. Basically for the past 10 years, she has taken absolute control over every facet of sex. When, how often, what positions, what touching was allowed, what touching was not allowed…everything. Fact is, I have no say in any of it whatsoever. I told her this was fine much of the time, but not all the time. She wants the control but none of the responsibility. And I've become weary of it. I'm not going to be able to stay hard on her schedule all the time, cage or no cage. In fact, the cage is the one place where I have asserted some semblance of control since if she had her way, it wouldn't be around.
We talked for a bit, and while talking, I guided her hand to my cock where she began squeezing and working it. Hand jobs are different that making love, simply because one person is getting the other person off. While still having some intimacy, it is more physical in nature and more about release. Much less risky for her. And me.
Masturbation also has this similar dynamic, where giving up control is not an issue. Might be something to consider for those of you women struggling with guys wanking off instead of having sex with you. Could it be about control? Is there give and take? Do both partner's have a say? Are both allowed to contribute?
Back to the story at hand; basically while the conversation drifted off to mundane matters of work and Arwyn's worries, I came. Just as I came, there was the sounds of exploding firecrackers and fireworks. We did share a good laugh at that, as we saw the clock struck midnight just as I came. So I did manage to ring in the new year with an explosion of my own!
Nothing else was resolved out of all this, but at least Arwyn has something to think about. She has an appointment with her gyn later this month, so maybe some of the physical issues might be addressed then.