The Eeewww Factor

Warning: this entry may get kind of graphic in a sort of…er…earthy way. If you're looking for a less graphic discussion (but maybe even more provoking) following a little different line, check out my latest in Unsolicited Advice.

So hold on to your butts, because we're going in to some deep psychological waters.

FTN's wife made a post, commenting about some of the difficulties she had with sex. Especially oral sex. Her views are so congruent with my own wife's thoughts on the subject, she might wish to watch my story as to one possible future she's looking at. Maybe it will scare her enough to fly right.

Her objection is primarily the "Eeww" factor of oral sex. The nether regions are the source of pee and poop, not a source of pleasure. This view is reinforced everytime she changes a diaper or uses the bathroom. After any contact with those nether regions, there is much hand washing. How can anyone ever imagine putting their mouth someplace where you don't allow your hands to tread without heavy doses of antibacterial soap? I mean the idea behind the washing is in case you touch your mouth, right?

Putting a penis into a vagina is different than putting your mouth there. Since these are both essentially equally dirty and disgusting organs, they more or less balance out their mutual grossness. Two Eewws make it alright. At least tolerable.

So, ladies. I've read how some of you love cock sucking. You love licking and slurping and sliding your tongues all over it. Some of you even (gasp!) swallow! Is it always after he's totally decontaminated himself with a shower of Lysol disinfectant? Where is the "Eeww" factor?

None of us are surprised that guys might not care. We are, afterall, dirty, disgusting pigs who love to exist in filth. But many women have wondered at how a guy can possibly enjoy the sensations and smells of oral when it is so dirty down there. A place the ladies never touch without a thorough scub down. Now he's putting his mouth down there and (gasp!) might even want to kiss you afterwards! Heaven forbid he had his penis anywhere near there, because then there is the combination of germs, bacteria, bugs, creepy crawlies and cooties to contend with. Diry, nasty, filthy, disgusting cooties. And someone wants to eat yours or, even worse, have you consume theirs.

It's amazing cocksuckers and pussy eaters even sleep at night, unless they happen to be in total denial. What health-concious person would even dream of doing such a thing? Who, in their right mind, would even THINK this is okay? What a bunch of SICK perverts!


Of course I have a take on this, but I'd like to see what others can do with this vexing dilemma. Especially women, as it is this population who are most often plagued with the Eeww factor. I don't expect the huge outpouring that I had on my previous oral sex post, as this is squeamish territory. It's not nearly as much fun. But it is at least as important, especially those unable to get their minds past "Eeww."

I wonder if I've scared anyone off from oral sex altogether.


17 Responses to The Eeewww Factor

  1. Thats it. I never thought about it in that light. There is absolutely NO WAY I’m ever going to put my mouth in wife’s nether regions. You ruined a good thing for me.
    Just kidding. I really don’t care about the “EEWWWWW” factor. No surprise there I’m a guy. I have no prob;ems licking, kissing, sucking, etc. in any of the pee/poop region. I find it to be very intimate. It really don’t matter to me if she is fresh out of the shower or just coming home from work. She’s the woman I love and that is all that matters to me.

  2. Rob says:

    Well still no comments yet from the ladies (although I’m sure there’ll be some in due time) but I think that they should agree to this much – basic personal hygene (ie., a properly washed body) is as important to basic “vanila missionary” sex (or whatever one wishes to call it) as it is to any type of “kinky oral” sex (or whatever anyone else wishes to define THAT to be) – ewwww issues notwithstanding 🙂

  3. virgin says:

    You want to talk eeewww? Human genitalia are far CLEANER than human mouths. I have heard statistics that say that something along the lines of 15% of all dog bites become infected, where all or nearly all human bites do.

    Our mouths and hands are exposed to the environment all day: touching, tasting, inhaling… Our genitalia get special treatment, being held within a double layer of clothing all day.

  4. Dewdrop says:

    I thought a double layer of clothing HELPED the germs breed??

  5. So Gone says:

    As long as I think they have some good personal hygiene – it doesn’t bother me, and I’ve been down on men AND women. Of course, if you head there and notice that something just ain’t right, it could change your mind on your performance.

  6. Katie says:

    Well it didn’t bother me until now! :b

    Nah, I’m still okay with it, the pleasure out weighs the “eww factor” for me.

  7. Leela Lamore says:

    OMG I’m a sick pervert!!!!!!!! Nope aside from the ewwwww factor you did it so well, I actually squirmed in my seat and not in a good way … Oh heck how am I ever gonna have sex again with out this post in my head HAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA I think we will survive.

    Honestly no that is not really a concern with sex I have no issue with oral sex and no my mouth actually waters when I get to suck Phoenix off.

  8. C-Marie says:

    The EEWWWWW factor hasn’t changed or budged my ambitions to put a stiff one in my mouth! No Way! As long as things are “tidy”, I’m going down….

  9. Lizzie says:

    Thanks for the inspiration! After reading all this stuff about oral sex I just had to give my husband one before he left for work this morning. He REALLY thanks you! Of course I had to post about it on my blog too.

    On a serious note…girls, if you are that grossed out, use a dry condom. That way, both of your needs get met.

  10. Aroused Girl says:

    Er…how about the oldest sex-tip in the book…if you are grossed-out by it, have a shower and wash together first. A couple of extremely hot episodes for me *started* in the shower.

    Even without a shower first, I love giving and getting. We could all probably use a few more germs in our bodies these days.

  11. Tajalude says:

    I dunno, the idea of being grossed out just never crossed my mind. I’d dare say it was almost instinctual for me to WANT to put my mouth there. As far as how he thinks about it, who the hell knows. I’m always conscious about trying to be “fresh” and even asked what his “hair” preference was, doing whatever he said he wanted, but none of it has led to more action. He sure likes receiving, though. Grr.

  12. aphron says:

    Anyone who has an ounce of caring would make sure he/she washed. I’ve never dated anyone unhygeinic, so I can’t understand it. A lot of hang ups are like phobias: no real rational basis. For example, Wife says she doesn’t want to perform oral sex too much, because I might get used to it. I drink coffee everyday and always enjoy it. She still has a hang up. Same with me performing oral sex on her. She loves, but she has to be coaxed into it. Once into it, she doesn’t want me to stop. Nothing rational about it. Using rational arguements won’t get someone to change his/her mind. Only emotion and time will undo those repressions.

  13. Shay says:

    Mmm like you said above: “Spreading cooties feels good.”

    It never occured to me to think of a penises (in general, I’m sure there are some exceptions) as being too dirty for oral (unless it’s right after anal – that’s just not healthy, I hate it when they appear to do that in porn!)

    I’ve posted this elsewhere (and again sorry to plug my own blog) but this product *might* help with the eww factor:

  14. That was a great post. It made me laugh.
    I know that I am in the minority on this subject…..
    I have to say that I don’t have the “eewwww” factor. I just wasn’t turned on by it. I used to do it when we were younger and dating, but for some reason it’s not something that turns me on anymore. It may just be that I have to find something else that turns me on. I have tried to work on it while we are in the course of sex….meaning that I don’t spend all of my time down there. I do enough to please and then we move on. I may grow to love it again, with time.
    However, I will say that NSN is great down there. Girls, be jealous!!

  15. Aimee says:

    Ha! I’d rather give someone a blow job than clean their toilet.

  16. Anonymous says:

    I think a lot of women are taught that sex is naughty and something women aren’t supposed to LIKE but something we are supposed to DO for our spouse/loved one/other. For the first 5 years of my sex life I never had an orgasm and I never really liked sex. I was too caught up in being ashamed or grossed out. With the knowledge that my husband loves me completely and just wants to give me pleasure I was able to let go and enjoy sex and embrace my naughty side. Now after 16 years our sex life is at the hottest its ever been and I hope it just keeps getting better. Oh and btw I LOVE giving him head because 1) it makes him feel good and 2) I am in complete control. 😉

  17. Just for your record, I am one of those women who does not….I repeat DOES NOT have an ewwww factor going on. And all ladies can’t have that gross out factor running through their heads or else there wouldn’t be any lesbians…right. Or bisexuals like myself.

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