Pining for the Day

09/19/2005

Monday

I have continued questing for the 2 minutes. And yesterday, as we were getting ready for church, I did manage to grab Arwyn and she sat on my lap for what must have been 5 minutes or so. It was nice, but of course my greedy self wanted more. She got a bit huffy, and I just said “Okay!” and let her get with whatever she had planned.

Nights have been anything but promising. The boys are usually in bed by 8:00, give or take an hour. and Arwyn goes straight down after that. Unless she’s on the computer. I’m otherwise on the computer, myself, sometimes until midnight or even later. There’s no way I could go to bed before 10. I just don’t need 10-12 hours of sleep. 5 is okay although 6 or 7 is better.

With yesterday morning being a nice start, and seeing as it has been 3 weeks since we’ve shared any sort of physical intimacy, I was looking forward to trying to start something. This time, she was actually in bed before my oldest. I came to reprimand him for still being up and there she was, in her inverted sleeping position, wrapped in her individual blanket. I spent some hours on the computer, and went to bed, taking care of my own prostate congestion by imagining those days before we were married and before we even knew each other very well. Those days when there was some 69ing, some oral and she let me touch, rub and squeeze her breasts.

She has always claimed that she needs a deeper emotional connection to have and enjoy sex. I beg to differ, since we fucked more during the first 3 months of our dating then any other time since then. If I put a pea in a jar everytime we had sex before we were married, and then took one out every time we had sex after marriage, I would still be far from the bottom of that jar…almost 10 years later. It was like the more she knew me, the less she wanted me.

D.

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2 Responses to Pining for the Day

  1. C-Marie says:

    “The more she knew me, the less she wannted me…”
    Maybe it’s more of a security thing. She seems to think you’re always going to be there so why bother doing the love dance, aye? It’s like being totally taken for granted. *sigh*
    Have you ever thought about whether Arwyn was having an affiar?
    That seems to be the first thing that pops in my head when JM and I have the libido collision. I guess that’s just my insecurities.

  2. Satan says:

    Do you really think it’s personal towards you, Digger? Or could you perhaps consider that it could be that she would act this way towards any man who became her husband?

    I’ve been reading you for a long time where you have been nothing but considerate and helpful to Arwyn. I’m starting to think that she just can’t deal with ‘life’ in a way that allows her to be happy and connected with other people, namely you.

    Just a little opinion from me. I just don’t think it’s *you*. Is that niave of me?

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